Saturday, July 17, 2010

Back in action...

So much has been happening over the past week that it's making my head spin! - I can't even make my thoughts slow enough to form coherent sentences - much less blog - but nonetheless, I'll give it a go and see what happens...

Last Sunday (yes, I still have thoughts of LAST Sunday in my head which in a way is nice because I usually can't remember what day it is at all - and certainly can't put my finger on a week ago - but...) Mom and I took the babies to church. It was the first time I've made it to church with them - ever. I walked in - familiar smells of furniture polish, incense, old wood, perfume, wine - like a second home. I grew up having chapel there every week. I went to church there most Sundays as a little tag along with my grandmother. Brent and I were married there. My dad's funeral was there. My baby shower, Mommom's funeral, and so many more in betweens and little happies as well and huge life changing events centered around this sacred ground. I was in a word...overwhelmed. I did well until the end though - until out of no where, I had a moment. It felt so. wrong. Wrong to be there cradling my babies proudly without my dad or grandmother to share in the glory. Wrong to have a piece missing as my little Kuylen couldn't share in the ooo's and ahhh's of the day. Unfair. Aching. Just wrong. My heart was beating and my head was spinning. A panic attack of sorts. "Just breathe," I thought. I got through - was totally exhausted, a little embarrassed and just ready to go.

I'll try again tomorrow.

Much of the week is a blur. I left Sunday afternoon to return to Lake Charles. The ride went well. The last hour was a bit hectic but not horrible. Mary Louise and David had physical therapy on Monday afternoon. It went well. We are really just waiting and watching for them to walk. Their balance is greatly improved as compared to last month. I really believe that Mary Louise can walk - she just won't let go just yet. When she's ready, she will...and boy will I have my hands full then!! David is able to stand independently for about 10 seconds and counting before easing himself down to a sit. He has started to try to take a step - but hasn't quite gotten there yet. Slow and steady, that little one continues to pleasantly surprise everyone with his strength and determination to do things "by myself!!"

Our house is still for sale. The viewing traffic has slowed but we remain hopeful. We WERE set to close on the new place on Friday...ah - the fiasco...we heard from the bank on Thursday at 4:30 that there were significant issues with the appraisal. In short, we are unsure at this point whether the purchase of the new house will work out or not...but I'll keep everyone posted of course...


No comments:

Post a Comment